The gospel for a twenty-six year-old underachiever

This morning, on my birthday… I felt like crap. It’s not the getting older which is the problem, but all the implications attached to that. The twenty-six year-old I am is not the twenty-six year-old I’d like to be. I’ve no career, am struggling to finish my master’s, have no wife, no children, no money, I still don’t perform my own music live; my dreams to become a great pastor are constantly being frustrated, I’m not well-thought of by some people in my own family, in my own church, even within my groups of friends; I still struggle with the same sins I did ten years ago; I’m still proud and arrogant, but filled with insecurities… I’m a certified underachiever. Plus, I had a headache.

Now, as I meditated on how rubbish I am, and spiralled into my own self-pity, I realised I wasn’t doing myself any favours, but I struggled to look up and seek guidance, also because of pride. As I prepared breakfast, my old housemate who is again staying with us for some time came up and we started talking. As we shared coffee and our personal struggles, I gradually realised once again… I am loved beyond my wildest dreams, by a God who knows all my weaknesses, all my filth, and yet is willing to constantly pour his love on me. What have I done to merit this?

Nothing.

That’s the gospel. Not even despite, but BECAUSE of my failure, my sin, my weakness, Jesus chose to save me. He chose to get involved with my muck and wipe the tears from my eyes. That’s grace… And I’m relying on it, for everything.

My joy is found not in my achievements, but in his achievements for me. As we meditated on our situations as well as on various complicated doctrines, we realised this is what we needed:

O LORD, my heart is not lifted up;

my eyes are not raised too high;

I do not occupy myself with things

too great and too marvellous for me.

But I have calmed and quieted my soul,

like a weaned child with its mother;

like a weaned child is my soul within me.

O Israel, hope in the LORD

from this time forth and forevermore.

(Psalm 131 ESV)

… Closeness with our great father. So I must preach the gospel to myself again, because I need it more than ever.

Calvin and his mates

Finally grabbing some time to post a new entry!

A few weeks ago, as I walked through the Parc des Bastions in central Geneva to soak up the sun, and strolled along the little wall beneath the monument to the Reformers, looking up at the smiling faces of J.C., G.F., J.K. and T.B. I noticed something which despite having walked past them countless times, I had never seen before: every single one of the four great reformers is holding a book, but not just holding a book, they are holding a page inside a book! This led me to a thought that made me chuckle to myself, imagining the ridiculous anachronism of a photographer trying to get the four camera-shy reformers all at once on camera, forcing them all to get away from their reading and to stand in one place for a moment, just to get a decent group pic… Hence the smiling faces (not!). This may seem strange, but they really are holding a page (picture proof!!!). If one looks closely, one will even notice that though Calvin is trying to do the intellectual cool guy pose by showing what he’s reading, he’s cheekily holding another page at the same time!

Now of course, this statue wasn’t built from any group photograph or painting, but the artists were smart guys, and this detail was obviously intentional.

I recently read Herman Selderhuis’ (expert on the history of the Reformation) biography on Calvin, which he wrote by using pretty much everything Calvin has ever written; loved it, he really brings Calvin to life in a realistic, non caricatured way, presenting him as a true human being, in fact, an extraordinary human being, and showing all of his personality traits in a balanced way. In speaking of him as an intellectual, he used the word “humanist”, which at first surprised me, but after some reflection it opened my eyes to something. The original concept and movement of humanism came before the “Enlightenment”, and was actually led mostly by Christians. Its original meaning and scope were not those of today, which are to “live and let live”, by placing humans at the centre of the universe. The supporters of the original humanistic movement were people who attributed value to all humans and believed that humans can change the world, and a major tool towards that, as it still is, was the education of everyone, which is why these people were avid readers, thirsty for knowledge. They were tired of the power being in the hands of the rich, who kept both temporal and spiritual knowledge for themselves and used it (or didn’t use it…) for their benefit over others. That is why the tagline of the reformation is: “Post tenebras lux”, meaning “after the darkness (of the obscurantism led by the Catholic Church), came the light" (of Christ, as people were allowed to read the Scriptures for themselves and discovered Jesus as he truly reveals himself in the Bible).

This explains why contemporary humanists and thinking Christians have very similar ways of reasoning, parallel streams of thought; is natural for their thinking patterns to look alike, when they share the same cultural ancestors.* It also explains why it is so hard for them to understand each other, and why so often they, or should I say ‘we’, are suspicious of each other! The basic assumptions are completely different and therefore the conclusions are different (quick example: Christians: “God is the centre of existence and giver of all joy, therefore humans can only find true and lasting meaning and joy in life by centring their lives on Him”; humanists: “Man’s existence is what defines the future of this planet, therefore humans can only find true and lasting meaning and joy in life by focusing their efforts on making everyone agree.” Caricatured, but generally true). There are so many similarities between the two steams of thought, and I greatly respect many humanists. We both believe in the intrinsic value of human beings. We believe in equality. We believe in the importance of education. One thing that could help open up the dialogue more would be if they could admit that they are just as exclusivist as Christians (and of course, all other monotheistic religions). Another would be to realise that the intrinsic value of human beings and equality were not invented by humanist philosophers, but are biblical values that had never existed in history before the Bible, and that obligatory education for everyone is something that was first instituted by Christians, not communists. This isn’t to knock la laïcité, which means secularism, but to note that if this value which is so held to by continental Europeans is truly respected, it has to include and honour the “laity”, which means everyone, not just the intellectual élite.

Back to our reformers, these guys basically, were readers! And contrary to what people believe, they didn’t only read the Bible. Calvin’s first book as a young man was a commentary on Seneca’s De Clementia and before he got into Theology, he was a Law student. Believing in education, with Thédore de Bèze, he started both the Collège and Académie de Genève (de Bèze is holding the Academiae curriculum in the statue).

These guys were working for change, nothing else. They weren’t there to make a name for themselves. That’s why they had a huge impact on history, and probably why today they are among the most misunderstood personalities of history.

… The other day I was showing the old town of Geneva to some mates from the UK, and we walked into the cathedral… It’s pretty boring. Nothing much to see there. Having lived in Canterbury for six years, with the stunningly beautiful cathedral at its centre, it seems truly unimpressive. Walking around that area where Calvin supposedly taught, walked, sat, slept, it looks old, but there’s nothing particularly aesthetic about it. There’s a reason for that. It was never intended to be. In the Bible, the church is the dwelling place of the presence of God, but “church” doesn’t mean “building”, it means “people”. The building, in Reformed tradition, is a purely functional place for believers to meet, not considered more holy than any other, or a place where God is more accessible than elsewhere. That’s why there are no items there to make one think so. Calvin’s biggest beef with the Catholic church was concerning idolatry (which is coincidentally one of God’s biggest beefs with Israel in the Bible!). That’s why the cathedral sucks as a museum. That’s why his house sucks as a museum. If I had to choose a museum to visit, I’d probably choose the Vatican several times over any other, because of its extravagant beauty. And even though I love the history of the Reformation, I still haven’t brought myself to visit the museum of the Reformation, right next to the cathedral: because visually, there’s nothing to see. I can read it all in a book. How weird do you think Calvin would find it that people actually visit his old house, his bed, his crapper? How weird would you find it, if you found out that after your death people came to visit your quarters? I remember the funny story of a toilet which was considered by its owner as a monument, because Sir Sean Connery had once taken a dump there… Weird. That’s idolatry.

Calvin and his mates knew that history wasn’t about them, and led unglamorous lives just like you and me. That was their joy. Contentment with what they had, and discontentment with obscurantism, elitism, malevolent dictatorship and idolatry. They made their lives to be about the glory of God and the good of mankind. Their buildings don’t shine out as some others do, but their lives and legacy shine on.

* Anyone wanting to argue about these definitions should first visit: http://www.cnrtl.fr/definition/humanisme

Sublimating...

So it's been a while, but here's another song. It's been on my heart for a very long time and I have just finished the lyrics. I prayed to God whether I needed to change anything and checked out the passage of Scripture that has in part inspired it, and reading through it I thought "That's it, I don't need to change it." I'm still a bit iffy on the melody, and my voice is sounding like an angry cat at times these days for whatever reason, the cold I think, but the lyrics are sweet as, even though I do say so myself. But it's like a legal download from heaven, so the copyright is kinda Jesus'. But I still put my name on it.

I want to give special thanks (this is the first time I've ever done this) to Dr. Tim Keller who has profoundly impacted me with his teaching on the subject matter, my Connect Group and other people at ICF who have forced me to think through my theology to explain it better, which only reinforced it and taught me grace, a few people who shall remain nameless whom God used to shake my world and break my heart, teaching me something about humility, and ultimately God, the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, who lovingly opened a can of whoop on me and especially on my own idols this last year and broke me down to build me up again... who keeps doing this, and who provided me with very vivid images that have undergirded the making of this song.

I have been able to come up with an adage which describes my objectives when I write a song, it may seem pretentious, but whatever, I don't care, I'm a wordsmith, that's what I do (though not always very well), and this is it: "Sublimating theology into music"... I love it. That's what I want to do.

As you can see, there's a lot of my heart poured into this song, so by all means, leave a comment, but be gentle. That'll be much appreciated.



I will redeem you
(Bringing down idols and grinding them into
dust to feed them to the wind...)

Written between 08/2009 and 03/2010

We are so alienated but I know you still long for me,
Every plan frustrated spelling how much you are weak.
The things you were so attentive to have caught you off guard
and turned themselves against you, bracing chains to your heart.

Weighed down by the very things you’d hoped would free you still
I’m coming after you, my feelings so strong they could kill…

Let my words come, running through the fabric of what makes you,
gently traumatising all you thought you knew…
Let my word go, cut right through the fetters that defiled you,
hurting, hurting to renew…

(Could anyone foresee or understand…?
For whose sake this blow will land?)

I’ll reach into my heart, and tear it asunder
hoping that my cry- will break the spell you’re under.
There’s fire in my eyes, I have nothing left to ponder.
My hammer will rain down the fury of a lover!

And all the statues came crumbling down, rubble covering all the ground,
perfect man-made carved detail, shown for imperfection veiled.
As the idols broke apart they lost their hold on your heart,
crushing gods crushed in this scene, there you stood, spotless, pure, redeemed…

You shine, with the knowledge that turns all things upside-down…
The splendour reflected in you is the beauty of all things true.

I want to sing my song over you,
I want to sing my song over you,
to call your name, forever: My Delight Is In You,
I’m here to sing this song over you.

That once barren ground has now grown a tree,
a garden of pleasures for just you and me…

© Joseph Antonio Natali, 2010.

14th Feb

Feel like I’m gonna get a lot of hate mail from dudes in a few minutes, and potentially even from girls!

I just wanted to comment on the subject of relationships, since it’s Valentine’s period, one which I’m not a fan of, not so much for personal reasons, I got over those with adolescence, but for corporate reasons; it’s one of those non-days which of course are just used for commercial purposes, but worse than that, I believe there are more depressed people on these kind of days than there are happy people, and that doesn’t just go for singles.

I’m sure couples experience crises on these kinds of days, when they’re not stable and they don’t know whether they’ll be together in a few days, or weeks, or months from now, usually because the guys don’t want to commit. I can’t speak as a guy who has his life all sorted out, so I’ll speak with a pastor’s heart: ladies, you’re worth fighting for. You’re worth respect, worth a guy who’s ready to invest into a relationship with you, so don’t settle. I don’t mean that you set ridiculous standards for his looks, style or income, those things can be worked on, but for his character, yes. You’re not his saviour, you can’t change him, something else has to. So if he’s indifferent, if he’s verbally abusive, if he’s physically abusive, if he can’t keep a conversation with you without his eyes darting to the next pair of buns that walk by, if he’s only affectionate on one day of the year because it’s the one day which he is reminded of by everything else, he’s not the guy for you, or not yet. Expect more from him, “I can’t help it” isn’t good enough. I’ve heard countless guys tell me things like: “I’m faithful to my girlfriend, but not in my mind”… And grin. As a guy, I know of the weaknesses of the mind, but that’s nothing to be proud of, nor accepting. As a pastor I deeply respect says: “When you’re dating, he’s on his best behaviour, so later on, you can only expect it to go worse…” let us use for a wonderful example the really nice guy I met on the train with a friend on Thursday. Engineer, fun guy, married with four kids, somewhere between his late 30s and early 40s. What I suspect his wife isn’t aware of is about what he told us in the most casual manner, while talking about Canada: “Oh Montreal, great place, wonderful dancing parlours.”… By dancing parlours, he meant those gentleman’s clubs known as strip-bars.

“I see it like going to a museum. What’s the difference, it’s all art.”

“Well the difference is the sleaziness”, says I.

“Right. Well I try to stay out of the really sleazy ones.”

Really? Wow, what an effort! The shocking thing is that he mentioned it to us because he expected us to high-five him like Borat would. When he asked us whether we went to those type of places, I just said “no, we’re good church boys”, which was a good enough answer for him, but not for us. We would have loved to tell him that it’s not our religion that prohibits us from going there, that even if we were offered, we wouldn’t, that there’s a huge difference between that and a museum, that the value of women is being thrown in the mud in those places and that he should repent and praise God that he still has his wife and four kids with him… And we felt frustrated that we didn’t.

See, if he doesn’t have the ideal to be faithful with his whole self from the start, it’s not going to get better 20 years down the line. Don’t settle for anything less, in fact, expect more than that!

So if you haven’t found the right guy yet, why don’t you let Jesus be your Valentine. If you’re lonely, he’ll comfort you, if you’re hurting, he can heal you. If you’re addicted or enslaved to something, he can free you, if you need help, he can support you. If you feel lost, he can direct you. If you feel worthless, he can show you how much you’re worth. If you feel unloved, he can love you. He’s the saviour you need. In fact, he’s the saviour that guys need! That I need! I’m not John McClane, I’m the kid who gets himself in a mess and who needs help, and eventually, thanks to him, I can grow up and get it together (cultural reference: Die Hard IV). When you realise that you’re not the hero of your story, that you’re just messing it up, his intervention can change you and really give you the tools to be a good guy… That’s one of the main points in the Bible, whether you believe in it or not.

So there you go, here’s an e-card to tell you Jesus loves you today. As cheesy as that sounds. But he really, really does.

Shed that skin...

Here’s another post that probably only 3 people out of my 5-fan readership will understand…

Exam periods are always the same… Ups and downs, you’re undulating with emotions, eating patterns, sleeping patterns etc… How I long for the time when I have a job and don’t have to suffer the whims of teachers.

After spending a whole day indoors last week, I decided I could take it no more. It had been snowing for days and I hadn’t even taken advantage of that. I was frustrated physically, intellectually and emotionally. I put my jogging gear on, plus a scarf, bonnet and my crappy torn woollen gloves and ran out into the night, flakes still descending upon the already white blanket covering Collonges.

There’s something quite special about running in the snow. Whatever light there is, it is reflected by the snow on the ground, so on a late night walk through the city with a friend last week, it seemed like it was daytime, but on this starless night it was an opaque continuum interrupted by luminous patches, depending on the presence of lampposts. There was so much snow and it was so dark that, when I reached the fields, I couldn’t differentiate the path from the field with my eyes; I had to feel the path’s harder ground. However, after a while, I decided the road most travelled wasn’t the right choice, since I’d decided to go for a shorter run than usual and wasn’t getting any exercise, so I dove into the open field, ending up a foot-deep in snow with soft ground underneath. That got my heart racing! I pulled my foot out of the snow with every step, jogging uphill towards the mountains I couldn’t see, starting to breathe heavily, looking back from time to time to see the marks I was leaving on the previously immaculate carpet, but the snow was so pure and thick, I couldn’t even see them…

I don’t know how long I ran for. Nonetheless, on my way back, going through the same fields, reaching what I judged was the centre of the biggest, whitest one, I rolled, landing on my back, and just lay there. I made an angel in the snow and just stared at the blank sky. No Betelgeuse, no Deneb, no Cassiopea. Just a sheet of grey. I felt better physically, but still couldn’t quite put my finger on what was bothering me, what I needed to evacuate… Then I heard it. I can never tell how I do, I just do. “Shed that skin… just shed it.”

The words rang deep. I was lacking the vision of eternity. I’d been living off of cheap grace, that asks nothing of me and gives me nothing to live for, instead of the powerful and costly grace I’ve received, that asks everything of me but gives me all things. Flesh was obscuring my sight and killing my thoughts, my moods, my heart. I was living contrary to my calling. It’s really hard to express this with words, even for me, but I just needed to realise anew the depths of the joys of living in light of eternity, the freedom of living in obedience to God (that awesome paradox, wonderfully explained throughout Romans chapters 5 through 8 in the Bible), the joys of running effortlessly in the grace of Jesus Christ, no matter what I do. I needed to shed my skin. To rid myself of patterns of thought set in over years, hidden in my flesh.

I got up, looked back at the very realistic angel imprint and back-flipped my way out of the field, that is, until I realised that isn’t feasible in the snow…

Days later, I realised that comes also from an attitude I have of waiting and hoping for something to happen in my life, something that is missing. I need to live in the ‘now’ of eternity, I have all things NOW, in Christ. Christ has to be my ultimate satisfaction, or else I’ll be constantly disappointed. And it’s not that I have to put that on him: He already is! I have to understand that again and again, and go to him to drink, not mess around with other dirty sources of water, as Lewis points out in his address “The Weight of Glory”, when he declares boldly that our desires are “not too strong, but too weak”!

I formulated it this way today in a note to myself:

“There’s no expiration date on God’s faithfulness, goodness, ‘betterness’ for me. If I start thinking like that, I’m just using him as another functional god and not worshipping and seeing him as the one true God. That kind of ‘use by date’ worship can never satisfy. There’s no time in life when God will stop being the only important thing and will only serve the purpose I assign to him if I have this or that other things as well. You can’t tell God “well, I’ll live my life for you, but I’d better be married by the time I’m twenty-eight, otherwise my life will be wasted.” That’s using him, and elevating your self instead of giving it up and finding your place at his feet, as his child. You end up like the older son in the parable… Only when God takes his place as the centre and source of everything I live for will his joy, love and power truly flow and overflow into every area of my life, and make sense of everything that doesn’t, existentially satisfying me.”

John Calvin said that our hearts are idol factories. I have to regularly kick the things that would take their place in my life as functional gods out of my heart, or else my heart will grow sick. There’s nothing else that can be my saviour… No-one else can take the pressure, and all things material will anyway pass away in the face of eternity. And when eternity fully comes, the things I worry about now will lose all meaning, so might as well live like that now, trusting in God’s faithfulness, goodness, ‘betterness’.

That’s kind of two posts in one, sorry for the battyness, but I don’t care, nobody reads this anyway! (Except for you, thank you very much!)

Music that runs shivers down my spine as I'm writing this: Tonight, by LaRue:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWZEJQTlEks

Prophetic Fields again

So I know I haven't blogged in a long time on either of my blogs... My French theology blog readers are going to get a treat in a few weeks' time, stay tuned if that's you, and here there are a couple of things I've been wanting to write, one of them a Translation Studies (traductologie, it sounds so much cooler in French) short I should be writing for my School's paper, then a couple of reviews for some very cool EPs (stay tuned, I haven't forgotten about you!).

Truth is, I haven't been very creative at all in the last two months, three weeks of boarding school sucked the life out of me, both physically and spiritually. And since my only means of inspiration and creativity is relationship with God (so really, he gets all the credit), I can't do jack if my prayer life sucks! :) But I like that, otherwise I'd be like those kids who always write about how depressed they are. For some reason, their music sells, and mine stays in my basement! ;)

That having been said, I picked up my electric guitar for the first time in ages the other day and just now I had a bit of a jam. Clearly inspired, after changing a string, I played a song I wrote a few months ago, a song I was afraid I was going to have to throw out... But now it's been redeemed, as I just brought some final changes and touches to the lyrics that make it just right. What's really cool is that it sounds great both in quiet acoustic and in shredding diminished chords with distortion. I love it.

Racheté le 29/09/2009

Fields of prayer

Seasons come and seasons go,

You live in moments and never know

What the person who looks back to this instant will be like…

I was walking through these fields only a few months ago,

frozen in the winter who’d think anything would grow?

(It feels) there’s a beauty that eludes me, just can’t focus it in one place,

like the petals of a flower that dried and … were blown away…
Looking beyond the things I see that are so temporary,

there’s something deeper that somehow is not quite so ordinary…

Well, I’m here, I’m real, I’m flesh, I feel,

I’m no fake, feel the wrinkles on my face…
The presence of the divine impinging upon time

washes over troubles and perplexities of my mind…

Now the focus has been brought, this elusive beauty caught

The writer of this play has written all over it his Name.

Every little detail of this ever-changing landscape

gets meaning from the brushstroke of a painter that creates.

The symphony of colours finds coherence in this state

and harmonies placed here and there hang unexpectedly in the air… (in the right place.)

And having tuned my ear to this fugue now I can hear

…The song, composed for me, played through everything I see. …

And when the fields are ripe for harvest, I’ll hold her in my arms,

Walking through the wheat so fair, like diving into silky hair…

Every word I speak or write, a step of faith towards you,

Week after week praying and fasting for you.

All my senses being played on in this feast of art laid out

Generates a conflict somewhere deep inside of me.

‘Cause what I’m being shown, at the moment, I don’t see.

So the timing’s not quite right… But I’ll trust in the might

Of the comprehensive artist who orchestrated this whole sight…

Ripe cherries and wild strawberries bring me to this song,

Sprouting behind leaves, appearing as I walk along!

The sun goes down, the shades grow longer on my fields of prayer,

I turn to give them once last glance, tomorrow I’ll be back here…
(I can hear …)

When the fields are ripe for harvest, I’ll hold you in my arms,

walking through the wheat so fair, like diving in your silky hair…

And you should know that to see your smile, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do,

So but for now, I’ll keep on praying and fasting for you…

When the fields…

© Joseph Antonio Natali, 2009

What a coincidence, last night, I had an awesome time with God...

Whitest homeboy in Italy (apart from all the tourists!)

Mardi, 21/07/2009

I stepped out into the Roman heat about a week ago at Fiumicino airport, where my parents picked me up to drive me back up to Tuscany. This is my first Italian summer in a couple years, and I’d forgotten how heavy it can get. Many envy the fact that I get to spend time here over the summer, and though I do love coming here when I can, I’m quickly reminded of the many ways in which I don’t fit in… I’d really love to come here with some other people, so as to look more Italian than someone else and enjoy this truly lovely place with the company of some mates, hopefully one day… On the Feniglia beach, on the first day here, sporting slightly embarrassedly the tighty-brownies I found at home (sorry for putting that thought in everyone’s head), having forgotten a decent pair of trunks back in Switzerland, I realised I’m the whitest guy in Italy, and as the days have gone by, I saw that fact confirmed in more than one way.

Last week-end I went to my first Italian wedding ever, which was interesting after the never-ending wave of English weddings I’ve attended in the last 4 years. Great opportunity to get a new suit, so a couple days previous to the event, Dad took me to our favourite local “negozio d’abbigliamento” to have a suit fitted. I couldn’t help but notice a lovely linen white jacket and once I’d put it on, that was it. H-O-T! With a swish red linen shirt to go with and brown leather shoes, I was ready to rock the Casbah… It’s not that I try to stand out, it just kind of happens! Upon arrival at the celebration, I quickly realised I was the only guy wearing a white suit, and that the only other blondes there were the girls with bleached hair. I clumsily attempted to introduce myself to the other guests as “Giuseppe”, but failed miserably; anyway, at the table I was sat at in the evening, I was the only guy from out of town, so my ever-confusing story came out pretty soon. Funny thing, an Italian wedding: tons of amazing food, plenty of wine, some of the guys looking like Mafiosi with massive sunglasses, others looking like gigolos, with their striped suits and collars pointed upward, all women wearing décolletés down to their solar plexus as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Another gaffe I made was to answer, when asked what is the best food in the world, after all my travels, not having quite realised it was rhetorical, “Oh Italian of course! … Though the Chinese are pretty good too…” I almost got stabbed and mauled by the girl I was talking to. “I’m just saying (blargh! Dying…), we owe them a lot… historically… Marco Polo (last breath)…”

But it was a lovely wedding and I had a great time, even the Catholic ceremony was really enjoyable, though it led me to many thoughts concerning the papist dogma. The priest was actually fun to listen to, something I don’t think I’ve ever experienced, and some of the theological points he made were spot on, but my dad did notice me seething with my fists clenched and my head bowed in groaning when the aforementioned speaker declared the omnipotence of Mary and invoked prayers for dead people… (my thoughts at the time, something along the lines of: “Sho-Jesuuu-ken!”)

As I write this, I’m actually sleep-deprived, and should be in bed right now, there’s another story. We’re actually right in the middle of a heat-wave here in Italy, and it’s killing me. Now some of our southern readers living in northern countries are saying “heat-wave, gimme some of that!” but that is something I’m just no longer used to. Lying in a puddle of sweat in the middle of the night, worrying whether you are actually going to dry up and they won’t find your body in the morning, is not a nice thing. Which is why I am sleeping in the basement, where there is yet a bit of humanly liveable atmosphere left. However, since I’ve been going from place to place, I’ve found myself in different accommodation settings for the past few nights. The most fun was in my sister’s room, on the fifth floor of a block of flats in central Rome.

I hadn’t actually been to Rome since December 2007, when I did my CELTA course there, and I suddenly decided two days ago to head down to what I’ve tentatively denominated the “beautiful chaos” of the capital. My sister spent last week-end touring the north of Italy with a friend, trying to promote her album which is just wonderful (and available on iTunes: Eli Natali, Interprétation), by playing in skanky bars. As she came down to go back to work, I hopped on the train with her. I spent half of yesterday recording some of my own songs on her awesome system (for my own use, so don’t worry about being asked to listen…) and then indulged myself to a walking tour of the beautiful cultural capital of Europe. It has been several summers since I came to Rome, but I realised after a while… Rome smells. In the winter it’s not noticeable, in fact that is why it’s the best time to visit, but as the sun beats onto the rubbish dumps and the dog poo at the corner of every street, the odour rises to create something quite unpleasant in some parts of town. Thankfully, the historic spots are taken care of a bit better and I was able to enjoy all those places yet again. There’s something quite nice about having familiarity with a place, and I’m getting to know parts of Rome quite well. My walk took me all the way back to my private spot in the metropolis, a café in the Feltrinelli bookshop of Via del Corso, within the great Alberto Sordi arcade. Italians don’t do cafés the way Brits and Parisians do, enjoying a mug over a couple hours with one friend or just on their own, no, they sometimes come in loud groups of even four or five, something I’d consider quite bothersome, say, on the first floor of Nero’s in Canterbury. In fact, I’m often the only freak in Rome sitting on my own with my cappuccino reading or jotting thoughts down for several hours! Anyway, even on my own I enjoyed doing the touristy things, taking photos here and there, even though I’d love to take someone round those places, share them with others… I finally ended up in Termini for dinner with some old friends of mine…

Working in a language school you get to meet some interesting people. I’m down with the Chinese-Roman crew, a group of second generation Chinese kids grown up in Rome… Good kids, but even they are more Roman than I am. I was so pleased to be able to meet up with them after such a long time: we met at an awesome Hong Kong restaurant right next to Termini station (go there if you get a chance), owned by my friend Angelo’s parents, but he was the boss that night, and soon, Paolo, Mirko and I (obviously, they have Chinese names) had about a dozen plates of different specialties on the table, eating Chinese style, just picking and choosing randomly from dish to dish. I was proven right: real Chinese food is on par with Italian. Fried sausage, chicken’s feet, whole fish, Korean gnocchi, breaded chicken, Cantonese rice, the list goes on… At the end, I ask my Chinese brother: “Chyin, geiwo júu…” Got any liqueur? “I’ll sort you out.” He comes back with a bottle of what appears to be sake, fills my glass to the brim and says “drink up!” After the first sip, I was sure it wasn’t sake… I can’t believe the Chinese, who can hardly handle alcohol, would make 62% drinks!!! Cao Liang Chiew… friggin’ punk. Burned a hole right through me. But it was fun. For them. “You not gonna have any?” I asked. “No, no, I’m fine.” Anyway, it was a good night, and in the end, he didn’t charge us, because he’s a legend.

My night ended later on, as I got a lift back to near my sister’s and went to meet her where she was at. Having dinner in the street, with a table and everything, in this hippie corner of town, where people just hang out. It was quite something, to see all the neighbours sitting round the table in their alleyway, eating and drinking, and talking about the deep stuff Italians always end up talking about… Out of a film almost, like Stealing Beauty. A part of me couldn’t help but feel out of place, slightly bourgeois, though I’d probably do that every night if I could! Following this short trip I have some more thoughts about the Roman life, still need to formulate them properly though…

So there it is, don’t know whether I said anything interesting, but I’m back off to the beach for some chillin’ and swimmin’…!

A place to rest

(Song written and played for Pat and Jeanne on their wedding day, the 23rd May 2009)

Vésenaz, 01/05/2009

A Place to Rest (ballad for two big-noses)


My thoughts float around the room
Trying to write a few lines,
Conversations, looks and places
Vividly come to mind.
Time and distance separate us
But can’t change memories of mine.

But now you are each other’s
And creating something new.
‘N’ though I am still your brother
I’m separated from you.
We’re moving on into life,
How we’ve changed, how we grew!

Writing songs to seduce him, and never playing them when he’s around.
Spending hours talking to her, but never gaining any ground.
Eventually you found each other, no more drama for the crowds…
You should know, you’re the best,
Glad you finally found a place to rest.

Mint tea:
I would talk and talk and talk
While you’d listen happily.
Your most quiet words of wisdom
Speaking sanctity to me.
Hey, I’ll see you after class,
You alone who would just let me be.

Fresh coffee:
We would talk and talk and talk,
Even sometimes disagree.
Your kind and brash demeanour
Bringing me maturity.
In our worn-out, empty houses,
In apparent poverty.
I wanted to be there for you,
Hope to still have your esteem…

Writing songs to seduce him, and never playing them when he’s around.
Spending hours talking to her, but never gaining any ground.
Now that you have found each other, there's no more drama for the crowds…
You should know, you’re the best,
Glad you finally found a place to rest.

© Joseph Antonio Natali, 2009

Song for Jude

28/09/2008-21/12/2008

(Tune created sometime in August 2008)

Who are you?
Making everyone around you pull the strangest faces
And change the way the talk like they rejuvenated…
Do you even realise what your presence here creates?
You’ve only just arrived, but since then this is a better place.

Oh, pretty child,
I’ve only known you for a while,
And though everything’s new to you
You teach me so much with your smile…

Oh, pretty baby,
I could stare at you for ages,
Lost in your wide-open eyes
Seeing everything for the first time.

Kneeling down beside your bed
Just to hear you breathing,
Wondering what’s inside your head,
What could you possibly be dreaming?

As I put you in your cot tonight and turn off the lights,
Your crying slowly stops and you’ll soon doze off.
And I know that soon or late you will cry for a good reason,
‘cause this world’s so unfair, but don’t worry we’ll be there...

And I’m not going to tell you to make your Mama and Papa proud,
‘cause I know they already are…

© J.T. Noels, 2008

Bilingual news/Nouvelles en bilingue...

(Pour le français, c'est quelques paragraphes plus en bas, for English speakers, it starts here!)

I’ve come a long way, since the time I started once again attempting to write poetry at 18, then starting this blog at 20, after the French school system had succeeded in beating most of the creative juices out of me. The blog itself started as a means to the end of motivating me to write, and after a while it became the means to putting in the public sphere what I wrote and deemed worthy of publishing… If you look into the archives, you’ll see that writing truly is, as with any other art, about practice. Now I can confidently say that I enjoy rereading myself, which is quite an important step to achieve, and recently I’ve been experimenting and learning different ways to pitch my entries to as broad a variety of readers as possible. I’ve been particularly touched by some of my old students of English, who, from France to Japan, have confessed that they have been reading my blog and enjoying it. I know some of my course-mates at university read it, and some of my friends from church do too… The thing is, I put such a broad variety of things on my blog that they can’t really know what to expect when they go there for the first time. Usually, people who are visiting a blog will know whether they want to come back to it by the time they’re halfway through the first post, and while I didn’t have much to say back in the day, anyone who goes to it now can clearly see that has changed. My posts go from songs I’ve written to poems, from short thoughts for the day to articles challenging the common cultural beliefs and practices of today, and to Bible studies. Now, I’m not shy about my faith, as some will know, but I want as many people as possible to get a chance to read my blog, and when I invite them to read it, and they go on it for the first time, I don’t want them to feel cheated, and start thinking I’m using it as a subtle way to tell them the gospel (in fact, it’s not a subtle way at all!). I want them to be intrigued, challenged, provoked by what I put there, sure, and I want anyone who has questions about what I believe, or comments to make about that to feel free, but I don’t want them to avoid my blog because they feel like it’s got nothing to say to them.

Nonetheless, theological content has been steadily growing, and in the past few days I’ve been meditating on the purpose of my blog as it is, and on the question: “whom do I write for?”

I guess for a long time I was writing for myself, and that’s okay for a while, but I believe there should be more scope for the writer, going beyond personal satisfaction – but that’s just my opinion, and that doesn’t go for everything: some of the songs I write, I write for myself. I must confess that often, one of my driving factors in writing and publishing on my blog has been to gain the approval of guys I greatly respect; I realise now how dumb that is, and that I need far more vision than getting a pat on the back. Now, if I’m putting reflections, and results of personal study out there, I should aim them more specifically, by communicating directly to a group of people to whom they should be relevant, and that would impinge on the way I write…

Indeed, since I believe in serving first and foremost the local church, and the area of mission to which I am assigned – by God that is, I have decided to start a new blog, without shutting down A Man on Fire, no, not at all, but putting all theological content on this new blog, for the resourcing of anyone who wants to be resourced…

Now, some of you may be thinking: “What’s the point of creating yet another theological blog? There are hundreds on the internet, and 99,9% of them are utter trash!” I’m with you, but the answer is simple: that’s only for English speakers. Whenever you want to be refreshed by good theology, you can go on to The Resurgence, The Gospel Coalition, The City Church Canterbury, the Newfrontiers, the Mars Hill Church websites and download great resources! Most churches of over a couple hundred people now have websites with great links. Every month there’s a new great book to read, written by the latest hot theologian… Not here. Though I belong to a great church, there just isn’t the variety of resources that English speakers have. Our local Christian bookshop, though it has a lot to show for, can at best offer the top best-selling Christian paperbacks from America, which I’m sorry to say, I’m not too thrilled about. Most of the bible study resources are outdated and look like they were written sometime before the flower-power revolution… If you know what I mean.

One of my greatest desires is to see what is happening in the Anglophone world, with regards to new Charismatic, Reformed, Restoration church movements, brought to continental Europe, which is lacking in hugely in this area, and part of the reasons for doing my Master’s in Translation is so that I may have a hand in making the phenomenal, excellent resources that are being produced in the UK and the US accessible for people here on the continent. I’m living in a mainly Francophone place (with a heavy international influence) and am a part of a mainly francophone, but also bilingual church; that is why the blog will be bilingual, in that I’ll try to write mainly in French, but there will be some English content. I will be translating bits and bobs from resources already available in English and writing my own material as well… It’s an exciting endeavour, and the beginning of something bigger, which I hope will bear great fruit in time and be a factor in making the New Reformation of the Church in Europe happen!

I already have an enormous amount of ideas rushing in, am starting to make a list of priorities, but there are no limits… Which makes it SO exciting!!!

http://nouvellereforme.blogspot.com/, put it on your RSS feeds!!! Anyone is welcome to read it, but I warn you, it’s gonna be radical…

Français

J’en ai fait, du chemin, depuis quand j’ai recommencé à écrire à l’âge de dix-huit ans, après que le système scolaire français avait réussi à me saper de toute créativité, et ensuite quand j’ai commencé ce blog à vingt ans. Au début, c’était un moyen de me motiver à écrire, mais une fois reprise l’habitude, c’est devenu plutôt un moyen de rendre public ce que je jugeais digne de publication. En vérifiant les archives, vous verrez vite que l’écriture, comme toute forme d’art, est une question de pratique. Depuis quelque temps maintenant je peux dire que j’aime me relire (en tout cas en anglais), un accomplissement considérable (selon moi !) et récemment j’ai même pu expérimenter différentes manières de viser mes articles vers une plus grande variété de lecteurs. J’ai été particulièrement touché par certains de mes anciens élèves d’anglais langue étrangère, qui m’ont laissé des commentaires provenant de la France jusqu’au Japon, me confessant qu’ils ont lu mon blog et qu’ils aiment ce que j’écris. Je sais que certains de mes camarades universitaires le lisent de temps en temps, ainsi que certains de mes amis de l’église. Mais le fait est que personne ne sait pas à quoi s’attendre quand il tape l’adresse dans sa barre de recherche pour la première fois, en raison de la vaste gamme de textes et de sujets que j’y publie. Et en général, un visiteur saura déjà s’il a l’intention d’y retourner même avant d’avoir lu la moitié de la première entrée qu’il trouve. Or, jadis je n’avais pas grand-chose à dire, mais quiconque se met à lire mon blog aujourd’hui verra bien vite que ce n’est plus le cas. La gamme d’écrits qu’on y trouve va de la chanson à la poésie, du mot du jour à l’article verbeux défiant les croyances et pratiques culturelles d’aujourd’hui, et à l’étude biblique. Comme plusieurs le savent, je n’ai pas de problèmes à partager ma foi, mais je veux permettre à autant de monde possible de suivre mon blog, et quand je les invite à le lire, et ils y vont pour la première fois, je ne veux pas qu’ils se sentent victime d’une subtile (mais pas tellement) ruse que j’ai utilisé pour leur prêcher à la figure, sans qu’ils s’en rendent compte ! Je veux éveiller la curiosité, défier les présomptions, provoquer les esprits avec ce que je publie, et j’aimerais que ceux qui ont des questions, ou des commentaires, à propos de mes croyances, se sentent libres d’en faire, mais je ne veux surtout pas qu’on évite mon blog à cause d’un sentiment que ce que j’écris n’a aucun rapport avec eux.

Néanmoins, le contenu théologique du blog est en croissance continue, et depuis quelques jours je médite sur le but de mon blog tel qu’il est, et sur la question suivante : « pour qui écris-je ? »

Je suppose que pour longtemps j’écrivais pour moi-même, ce qui va très bien pour un moment, mais je pense qu’il devrait y avoir plus d’ambition pour l’écrivain, au-delà de la satisfaction personnelle ; bon, ce n’est qu’une opinion, et je ne la partage pas pour tout : certaines des chansons que j’écris, je les écris pour moi-même, point. Je dois confesser qu’une de mes grandes motivations pour écrire a été de gagner le respect d’amis que je respecte énormément… Je me rends compte maintenant de la stupidité d’un tel effort, et du fait qu’il me faut une vision bien plus grande que celle de m’entendre dire « bien joué… ». Donc, si j’ai l’intention de publier mes réflexions, les résultats de mon étude personnelle, ils devraient être visés de manière plus spécifique, et je dois penser à les écrire de manière pertinente pour ceux auxquels ils sont adressés. Ceci aurait un impact sur mon style…

Et vu que je crois à l’importance de servir là où Dieu m’a mis, dans l’église locale avant tout, j’ai décidé de commencer un nouveau blog, sans arrêter A Man on Fire, au contraire, mais dirigeant tout ce qui est théologique vers ce nouveau blog, afin des ressourcer toute personne qui en a envie…

Laissez-moi vous présenter mon raisonnement : dans le monde anglophone, il y a des millions de blogs théologiques, la majeure partie desquels sont inutiles, voire contre-productifs, mais en tout cas, il y a l’embarras du choix, et on sait où aller si on cherche des bonnes ressources ; la majeure partie des églises de plus de 200 membres ont des sites internet avec téléchargements gratuits de matériel très bon ; tous les mois, il y a un nouveau livre qui sort, écrit par le dernier théologien branché… Mais ce n’est pas le cas ici. Bien que je fasse partie d’une église fantastique, il n’y a tout simplement pas la diversité de ressources dans le monde francophone. En termes de matériel contemporain, le mieux que la librairie chrétienne du coin offre, même si elle se présente très bien, sont les derniers livres chrétiens de poche américains, dont je ne suis pas particulièrement fan. La majeure partie du matériel d’étude biblique est vieux et semble avoir été écrit avant la révolution hippie… Si vous voyez ce que je dire.

Un de mes rêves serait de voir ce qui arrive dans le monde anglophone part rapport aux nouveaux mouvements de restauration de l’église, charismatiques et reformés, arriver en Europe continentale, qui en a gravement besoin. Une des raisons pour lesquelles je fais ce master en Traduction c’est pour avoir un rôle à jouer dans la traduction et distribution ici des ressources excellentes qui sont produites en Grande-Bretagne et aux Etats-Unis. J’habite dans un milieu plutôt francophone (sous influence internationale) et je fais partie d’une église à majorité francophone, même si maintenant on a un culte bilingue ; c’est pour cela que le nouveau blog sera bilingue, c’est-à-dire que j’essayerai d’écrire surtout en français (bonne pratique !), mais il y aura quand-même certaines choses en anglais. Vous y trouverez des extraits de ressources déjà existantes en anglais que je traduirais en français, ainsi que du travail originel (même si en général je m’inspire de plein d’autres auteurs !)… C’est un projet passionnant, et j’espère, le premier pas vers quelque chose de bien plus grand, qui apportera beaucoup de fruits avec le temps, et contribuera à la Nouvelle Réforme de l’Eglise en Europe !

Evidemment, ça allèche ma créativité et ma tête explose d’idées, donc je suis en train de faire une liste de priorités, mais il n’y a pas de limites à ce que je peux faire avec… Ce qui le rend TROP passionnant !!!

http://nouvellereforme.blogspot.com/, inscrivez-vous au flux RSS !!! Tout le monde est bien sûr invité à le lire, mais je vous préviens, ça va être « trash » ! (Comme on dit à Genève)

Peace...

Midnight entry

As I jot down thoughts for this post, it’s midnight and I’m holding my 9-month-old nephew, because he was crying so loud in his cot I couldn’t stand waiting for him to calm down and fall asleep, so I got him up to give him some food and just calm him down. Presently, he’s absent-mindedly pulling my hair and putting his hands in my face, looking around, quite obliviously. He’s generally a happy baby. Since his parents put him on solids though, I just realised for the first time that he has bad breath. Of course, no one brushes his teeth, since he only has one that’s not even above surface yet, but that’s about to change… I’ve gone through so much recently, bringing to an end the first semester of my Master’s degree; I spent a lot of time in the library, for multiple reasons, I fought through my exams and came out on top. I’m about to dive into the second semester, which will no doubt be lots of fun and hold plenty of challenges.

My latest “catch-phrase” (not sure whether that’s the appropriate term) is “such and such is proof of God’s existence!”… It generally relates to food. For example, “meringue is proof of God’s existence”, or “pancakes are proof of God’s existence”! But it applies to so many categories of things: waking up in the morning with snow falling outside your window, covering everything with a sheet of white; riding on the bus seeing light mist hovering over the lake; walking in the centre of town to see the sun rise above the city, breaking atop the buildings, “God exists!”

… One can see proof of God’s existence in the smile of a woman, the cry of a baby; or, in the cry of a woman and the smile of a baby, for that matter. The truth is, evolution doesn’t explain everything, even for its greatest advocates. How can music be a product of evolution? How can art? To take us back to the earlier subject, how can great, tasty food be the product of evolution, if all that differentiates us from other animals is our greater mental faculty, if all we are meant to be is thinking animals, whose unique purpose is reproduction and survival? These are things some people live for, yet, there’s nothing functionally useful about them, indeed, we’re going into the area of existentialism.

And why, oh why are we so appalled at the violence and suffering that happens in the world? Surely, that’s perfectly in line with the evolutionary worldview: there is no rhyme to the world, the strong eat the weak, how can we morally judge the world when we believe that’s the natural order of things, and therefore it’s perfectly normal for powerful nations to devour weaker ones… The base of the worldview does not warrant the moral outrage issued from our hearts.*

As such, we are freaks of nature! We call for judgement of a behaviour which should be perfectly acceptable, by the standards of nature. But this world isn’t fair, and without God, there is no rightful judgement of evil, indeed there is no such thing as good or evil. In an effort to make scientific sense out of the world, but taking God out of the equation, we have created an existential mess, generating more questions than answers, which simply bring on more hypotheses that are based on nothing much more than the fantasies of people with degrees. But since it comes from them, it’s called science. **

It’s easy to miss it when that is the world that you live in, where everyone thinks the same way, and God-whom-I-do-not-believe-in forbid, someone challenges the comfy worldview that glosses over the big questions, but these are all signs of man running away from God. People judge the Bible, calling it the product of man, and then go and produce theories (which are, therefore, product of man) and tell others to believe these! I can’t help but see that as a little hypocritical, to denounce someone for making a claim to know the truth, and then go ahead and create one’s own truth.

No, I believe in a beautiful Maker, with a sense of beauty, of holiness, and goodness. And I believe in sin too, which is the act of running away from that maker. To me, this baby I’m holding is proof of God’s existence, for he is beautiful.

And you could say that the reason I see him, and all those other things as beautiful is because I am born into it all and I have a socially constructed view of beauty, but that just doesn’t satisfy me, neither existentially, nor intellectually. And the thing is, it can’t satisfy you either, and you know it. And if it does, friend, nay, I do not judge you. I weep for you.


* Point taken from Tim Keller’s “Reason for God” series, part. “Suffering: If God is good, why is there so much evil in the world?” (Link in the title, little Easter egg there!)

** I'm more thinking about the multiverse hypothesis than evolution right here... I thought that came out wrong after re-reading.

The Farmer King (Parables of the Kingdom)

21/12/2008 – 10/02/2009
These words you spoke, as pictures of who you are,
Patient, joyous, tearful, a humble king, on a farm…
And as two world collide, you take over with your love
Making those who once were fatherless adopted, through the flood.


Friday, 27/10/2006

You start making bread in the morning, hiding yeast within the dough,
You walk into the fields with the seed you sow…
You pour your wine into new wineskins, but it’ll taste better than the old.

I’m seeking for a treasure in a field which isn’t mine,
Opening seashells by the seaside looking for the finest pearl.
I’ve sought joy in other things, but for the adventure set for me
I’ll leave it all behind.

The fishing season’s open and you cast out all your nets,
You’re sending out your sons and friends to pick up all the harvest.
Oh, what a feast, oh but what a tragedy,
For your friends who lied, and the crops that died,
I know you already cried…

I love you, but you still remain a mystery to me.
I’m fumbling through the adventure of what you’re calling me to be.
But I’ll enjoy your peace and gentleness 'cause I am satisfied in you.

Then I’ll eat the bread you baked in the oven, it rose, rose, rose.
I’ll pick the fruit off your trees as they grow…
I’ll drink with joy at the party, where you’re host.

I’m trying to dig deep and build a house upon the rock.
I fed the soil as you told me to I hope to grow a crop.
I’m reading all your letters as I make my way home to you.


© J.T. Noels, 2006, 2009

The fundamental elements of a nutritious breakfast

I know what you’re thinking: “Hang on! I’ve seen the back of cereal boxes, they show what a nutritious breakfast is, and they always include chopped up fruit, orange juice and a bowl of All-bran! (Seriously, even when the box is chocolate “cereal”, they show all-bran on the back!) All that stuff is fatty, addictive and you certainly can’t digest paper!”
Backtrack, let’s think about this: nutella? Awesome. Coffee: awesome. The Bible: verrrrry awesome, and mighty nutritious!
I know this is making me come across as the good Christian boy who reads his Bible every day, though I don’t, but seriously, this is a practice that has blessed me powerfully ever since I discovered its existence: Bible in the morning, the most nutritious bad boy there is! After all, “man does not live by bread alone, but […] by every word that comes from the mouth of YHWH.” (Deuteronomy 8:3)

If you’ve been through a bunch of books in the Bible already (like at least one of the gospels, Acts, and some of Paul’s letters), and you’re wondering where to go next, you may want to consider going through the non-Pauline epistles (the letters not written by Paul). They’re at the back of the Bible, covering so few pages you wouldn’t even know they were there, but man! can you get some spiritual mileage out of them? (The answer is yes.) I remember the first time I went through them, about 3 years ago, I was so amazed! The thing is, the two main authors of these are Peter and John, the men who were closest to Jesus in his time on earth, you know, guys who just knew him personally, so it’s quite special to read them; I guess you could imagine these guys giving a best-man’s speech at Jesus’ wedding, which in some sense they are, praising him as only the closest of friends could do.

I started reading 1 Peter last week and was blown away afresh by the verve, the passion, and the discourse of Peter, so much so that I believe an appropriate title for at least the first part of the letter would be:

An Ode to Security in Salvation

The particular, and fantastic thing about Peter, is that he doesn’t present a systematic theology, a logical sequence of arguments to make a point about God, like Paul does in Romans for example (another letter I absolutely delight in, it’s like porking out on bacon at breakfast), but rather his whole rhetoric flow is intricately woven to speak of the character of God, the salvation Christians receive, the person of Jesus in a way that one could easily miss if they didn’t meditate on every word; it’s like music, each word being a note, seamlessly following each other in uninterrupted sequence, as a stream of water. I say it’s not presented as a systematic theology, but it’s absolutely packed with weighty theological meaning, in a way only someone who is absolutely overflowing with the knowledge of God in his mind but also in his heart could formulate it! In fact, as you read it you can only say, “it must have been written by Peter, because only someone who knew Jesus intimately could speak so freely, lovingly and passionately of him!” (In fact, there’s another clue as to the fact that Peter really wrote it, which comes later in the letter, and which I absolutely love.)

Yet, at the same time, there’s this weird and wonderful fact that someone else helped him write the letter: Silas, or Silvanus (which today, I guess, would be Silvio), as Peter admits at the end of this letter (5:12) helped in the penning of the letter. This was probably for the simple reason that Peter didn’t write very well in Greek, the language used in the letter, and his mate helped in the translation and the editing of the letter, which is quite long. However, even considering Silvio in the writing process, something is just odd: Peter was a fisherman. In French slang, there’s a great word to describe what kind of person he would have been: un bûcheron, which means a wood-chopper… “Uh, didn’t he just say he was a fisherman, oh, maybe, part-time job…” no, it’s a word used to describe a guy with a big physical structure, big hands, maybe not much mental activity going on (though not necessarily), basically, a brute: “Me, cut wood!” Now, this is no disrespect to wood-cutters or fishermen, in fact I met a very nice wood-cutter a few weeks ago, whom I would have described as a bûcheron upon first glance (the guy was like a wardrobe!), and who made me crack up when he told me that was his actual job! But Peter probably wasn’t a very intellectual or artistic guy to start with, in fact, you can see him put his foot in his mouth more than once in the gospel accounts written by his mates and even the one he gave through Mark, and having that in mind, going back to this letter, there is this elusive fact about it: it’s beautiful.

In order to understand how on earth we are to reconcile these two facts, I want to bring us back to a bit of narrative in the book of Acts, specifically chapter 2. This chapter tells of the outpouring of the Holy Spirit on all believers. This is no small thing: it marks a new era in the history of the world! It means that anyone who believes in Jesus can receive the Holy Spirit, dwelling within them, giving them a new life in Jesus. What happens after this event is that Peter, who was always doing silly things and saying wrong things during his time with Jesus, suddenly stood up and preached to a multitude, quoting Scripture and explaining why Jesus had come and had to die and rise, and explaining why all the believers were speaking in all the languages of the Mediterranean, something he wasn’t even expecting to happen until that day. It was phenomenal, so much so that three-thousand people converted to Jesus that very day! ... The Holy Spirit, that’s who the co-author of this letter is; he’s the one who inspires the most beautiful music, the most gripping narrative, the most captivating poetry.

Going back to the title, why do I call it an “Ode to security in salvation”? Well, as I said, it’s not in the style of Romans, that explains bit by bit why this is that and how this works with that, but it’s a big mix of rhetoric and he doesn’t bother explaining anything, debating opposing opinions, he just sings the truth that he knows is truth! Predestination, the supremacy of Christ, these things are things he simply assumes, and that is why it’s good for all Christians to study this letter, because it’ll sort out a lot of nonsense. He doesn’t do it in a mean way, he’s just loving every moment of life in the knowledge he has through Jesus!

But I’m getting ahead of myself; gosh, I’d love to just get lost in detail, but I have to try and keep it short, in the hope that someone will actually read this through!
For the purpose of simplicity, let me cut and paste the whole first chapter here: ESV, © Crossway publishing. (Thank you, e-sword!)

1Pe 1:1 Peter, an apostle of Jesus Christ, To those who are elect exiles of the dispersion in Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia, and Bithynia,
1Pe 1:2 according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, in the sanctification of the Spirit, for obedience to Jesus Christ and for sprinkling with his blood: May grace and peace be multiplied to you.
1Pe 1:3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
1Pe 1:4 to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you,
1Pe 1:5 who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
1Pe 1:6 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials,
1Pe 1:7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith--more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire--may be found to result in praise and glory and honour at the revelation of Jesus Christ.
1Pe 1:8 Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory,
1Pe 1:9 obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
1Pe 1:10 Concerning this salvation, the prophets who prophesied about the grace that was to be yours searched and inquired carefully,
1Pe 1:11 inquiring what person or time the Spirit of Christ in them was indicating when he predicted the sufferings of Christ and the subsequent glories.
1Pe 1:12 It was revealed to them that they were serving not themselves but you, in the things that have now been announced to you through those who preached the good news to you by the Holy Spirit sent from heaven, things into which angels long to look.
1Pe 1:13 Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.
1Pe 1:14 As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance,
1Pe 1:15 but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct,
1Pe 1:16 since it is written, "You shall be holy, for I am holy."
1Pe 1:17 And if you call on him as Father who judges impartially according to each one's deeds, conduct yourselves with fear throughout the time of your exile,
1Pe 1:18 knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold,
1Pe 1:19 but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.
1Pe 1:20 He was foreknown before the foundation of the world but was made manifest in the last times for the sake of you
1Pe 1:21 who through him are believers in God, who raised him from the dead and gave him glory, so that your faith and hope are in God.
1Pe 1:22 Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart,
1Pe 1:23 since you have been born again, not of perishable seed but of imperishable, through the living and abiding word of God;
1Pe 1:24 for "All flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls,
1Pe 1:25 but the word of the Lord remains forever." And this word is the good news that was preached to you.

First of all, I love the introduction verses! Peter, with the ease of a rhetorician such as Cicero, sums up the gospel in two verses, while expressing the Trinitarian character of God, and the functions of the three members of the godhead, finally expressing what the Christian life, indeed the Church of Jesus, is all about: grace and peace. A community of believers should be characterised by grace and by peace. Sure, there may be storms, but the children of God should always be rooted deep in the Word of God, which is grace and peace. Antonyms for grace and peace: legalism or religion, and strife.

What I want to do now, is pick out some words and phrases that I consider quite significant in this chapter, and show you why they are important and what they mean…

v.1: “elect”, v.2: “foreknowledge”, v.3: “mercy”, “he has caused us to be born again”, v.4: “to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled and unfading”, v.5: “by God’s power are being guarded through faith”, v.18: “you were ransomed”, “not with perishable things”, v.21: “[you, who] through him are believers”, v.23: “you have been born again”, “not of perishable seed, but of imperishable”…
Then there’s the final bit again:

“through the living and abiding word of God; for "All flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls, but the word of the Lord remains forever." And this word is the good news that was preached to you.”

… I remember a few years ago, before I started reading the Bible avidly, my best friend Liam challenging me, asking me where in the Bible it said that salvation is secure… I didn’t know what to say to him, ‘cause I didn’t read the Bible for all its worth at the time… But he did! In fact, he wasn’t doubting that salvation is secure, rather being a smarty-pants, but really, he was showing me that I needed to read it if I was to become a teacher… Thanks bro.

The truth is, there are so many passages that talk about this awesome, powerful, life-changing fact, that God is the one who saves, not man and his efforts, and as a consequence, there is nothing that man can do to unmake the work of God; you don’t even need to get to the New Testament to know that! God shows constantly throughout the history of Israel (really, anywhere in the Law, the Prophets and the Wisdom) that God’s will is supreme, and man’s will is not. In fact, man isn’t free! That’s why we needed to be “ransomed”, like a hostage. Better word yet, “redeemed” (alternative translation), delivered, set free! I would say, rather than the film where the dad pays the ransom and gets his kid back (that film never made it to the big screen, too boring isn’t it?), it’s more like the film where the father (someone like Sylvester Stallone, or Schwarzie, they’re always getting their kids abducted), locates the kidnapper, preserves his kid’s life whilst having an amazing, daring battle that leads to a crucial point where he’s bleeding badly, but manages to deliver the final blow (like a flying spinning kick), slash reach the gun and blow the bad guy’s brains out, not before having said an epic sentence like: “Sayonara, mutha’****a!”… I’d go see that film.

Hmm, I digressed slightly, but you see my point: God chose us. We did not choose him. God is the good guy. We’re the ones in need of saving. God’s hand is steady, his word stays true, his faithfulness endures, ours doesn’t. If we had any say in the matter, we wouldn’t want to be saved! We’re set against him, enemies of God. We became children of God, because his love is so overwhelming, his grace so complete! I met a girl recently who said she didn’t believe in predestination, though she was a Christian. I was like, “uh… Did you read Romans?” She had. She just wouldn’t believe it, because, in her eyes, that meant God is unjust. Though I appreciate that it’s hard to get one’s head around this stuff, if you’re a Christian, you need to adjust your worldview to what the Bible says, you don’t get to pick and choose what you believe and what you don’t. People who do that are just creating their own new religion, which doesn’t do any good for the salvation of anyone! If you can tell God how you want him to be, then he’s no god at all, he’s just an idea that makes you feel comfortable, and he will never be able to challenge you or get you to change. If you disagree with the Bible, consider the eventuality that you may be the one who is wrong… (Admittedly nicked that last main point from Tim Keller.)

How do I know that I can’t lose my salvation? Well, are you the one who saved yourself? (The answer is no, otherwise you have some serious problems…)
You were born again. Born again… Born. Again. That is not something you just do. It’s something that God does, and it’s not something he unmakes; what does he say? Of “imperishable seed”!!! Immortal salvation! Because of God’s mercy! Is the precious blood of Christ (v.19) good enough for your eternal salvation?

If you believe in this salvation obtained through the sacrifice of Jesus, his factual resurrection and his Spirit touching your heart to know him, then rejoice, because no one, NO ONE can take it away from you!!! Not even yourself, in all your stubbornness. Not even myself, with all the sin that I know I do!

If you don’t believe, I’ll admit that this was all quite full on, but I would say this: consider believing. No one else can offer you what Jesus does.

I’d love to keep going on into chapter 2, that tells us about Jesus being the cornerstone on which the whole Church rests (not Peter, as some would have us believe), but I’ll stop now; I’d love to hear feedback and questions from anyone who sincerely was touched, or confused by this.

So there you go, breakfast is good, and sometimes you get to have a bit bigger one, more like brunch with pancakes (which I had this morning) ;)

Ciao y’all.

Challenge

Nicked this off someone else's blog. Made me laugh!... I sincerely hope this isn't what I hear when I meet JC. By the way, Pete's not at the entrance of heaven, can you imagine how annoying that would be, if you were Jesus' closest friend and just wanted to hang out with him, but he gave you the job of waiting outside to direct people to the party?... That would suck. Please people, re-read Matthew 16 and understand that passage the way it was meant to be, not the way some religious guy misread it...